Answering the Phone

New York          TULLAR-MEREDITH CO.          Chicago

By Effie Louise Koogle. The “totally different” Christmas entertainment. Add to the attractiveness of the minstrel show idea the distinction of having “His Royal Nibs” as Interlocutor, with equally unique personalities as End Men, endow them with a program flashing with fun, brilliant with beauty, enlivening with song and teeming with specialties, and you have a scream of delight from start to finish. The most novel novelty of the age. 25 cents.

By Edith Palmer Painton. A class play in four acts and an epilog. 6 males, 6 females. We have prevailed upon the author to allow us to publish this remarkably successful commencement play, which has been leased in manuscript for several years, and which always scores a brilliant success. It is the highest type commencement play. Acting rights free to purchaser of 12 copies. 35 cents.

By Louise Rand Bascom. 4 males, 5 females. This accomplished author has done nothing better than this absorbing story of a summer vacation and the marvelous transformation of a grouchy father into a genial friend. The summer boarders are every one eccentric characters and the opportunities are immense. Clean, wholesome, elegant. Strongly recommended. 25c.

By Misses Rice and Clark. 14 females. A boarding school episode lively with vivacious pranks and interesting situations. The plot is strong, and culminates in a happy surprise. Stunts and specialties introduced. A splendid class play. 25 cents.

A capital collection of the spiciest comic dialogs, comedies and farces by the best known writers in America. These plays are short, strong, pithy and witty, easy to give, and require only from two to six characters. Just right for schools. 30 cents.

The cleverest humor of modern times. Monologs, readings and recitations, portraying the funny side of present-day notions and doings. Fresh, crisp, snappy. For all ages. 25 cents.

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[1]

Answering the Phone

A Farce



By

ELIZABETH F. GUPTILL



Price 10 Cents



All Rights Reserved, Amateur Performance Permitted

265 West 36th Street, New York        14 W. Washington Street, Chicago

Copyright 1914 by Tullar-Meredith Co
International Copyright Secured

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[3]

Characters

Mrs. Courtney; Miss Eleanora Courtney, her daughter; Nora Flanagan, the new hired girl.

SCENE I.

The living room of the Courtney home. Mrs. Courtney dressed ready for the street. She gives finishing touches to her toilet before the mirror, then steps to side door.

Mrs. C. If any one calls while I am gone, Nora, say I am out. Make hot biscuits for tea, and open a jar of strawberries. Be sure to answer the phone. The last girl I had didn’t know what a telephone was, and ignored it all the afternoon. It made me a lot of trouble, and I had to let her go. I will leave the door open so you can hear it.

Nora. (Without.) I’ll answer it, mem, to be sure.

Mrs. C. Very well. I’ll be back before tea time, but don’t tell any caller so. Just say I’m out. If they ask when I’ll return, you don’t know.

Nora. Faith an’ I do, thin—befoor tay time.

Mrs. C. I mean you must tell them you don’t know. Remember, now, and be sure to answer the phone.

(Exit Mrs. C. by other side door. In a minute, Nora appears from kitchen, looks toward that door.)

Nora. Sure an’ she didn’t lave the outside dure opin, so it must be this dure she was afther manin’. So the last gurl didn’t know what a tillyphone was, didn’t she? Will, sorra a bit more do I, but I’ll answer it if it shpakes to me, civil-like. It must be in this room, for this was the dure she lift open. Now is it a Polly Parrot, or what is it? Begorry, its Nora Flanagan that don’t know at all, at all. Come, Tilly, Tilly, Tilly! Come [4] show yuresilf, and lit me hear the voice av yez. Where in the wurruld doos yez kape yersilf? Come Phony, Phony, Phony! Come, that’s a good baste! (She has been looking everywhere. She now seats herself.) Stay where yez are, thin, bad ’cess to yez! I naden’t answer yez if yez don’t shpake, that’s sure! (Phone rings; Nora jumps, with a little scream.) Sure an’ I niver heard the durebell sound as near as that! (Exit.) (Comes back muttering.) Bad ’cess to thim byes! A rapping and a ringing and thin whin yez go to the dure, no wan bees there, at all, at all! (Phone rings again. Nora runs out, but comes back to put her head through the doorway.) Faith, an’ I’ll watch fur ’em this toime, and ketch the crathers! (Exit Nora. Phone rings again. Nora enters, and seats herself.) Sure, and that’s a quare thing! That wasn’t the durebell at all, at all. I thought it sounded in this room, but there’s no bell here, at all, at all! If this house is haunted, its mesilf that won’t stay a night in the place, I don’t wurruk where there’s witches nor ghosts, that’s flat. (Bell rings again. Nora looks at phone.) Sure, and I belave it’s that little box that’s makin’ all the noise. Perhaps that’s the phone, now. But how can I answer it? There is no dure to open. (Bell rings again,) Shut up, you sassy box! I aint goin’ to answer yez. (Bell rings again.) Well, ting-a-ling-a-ling, thin. Doos that suit yez? (Enter Miss Courtney, dressed for the street.)

Miss C. Why Nora, didn’t you hear the phone? You should answer it, when we are not here.

Nora. Sure and I did answer it.

Miss C. Who was it?

Nora. Who was it? The Ould Harry himsilf, I belave. He kipt a ringin’ and a ringin’ but niver a wurrud did he say.

Miss C. That’s queer! (Bell rings again, Miss C. goes to phone. Nora watches curiously.)

Miss C. Hello!—— Yes—— That’s too bad—— Something wrong with the line, maybe. The girl said she answered—— I’m sorry, but I’m just going out, and I must go the other way. Tell her I’ll run in tomorrow—— Yes—— Goodbye. (Hangs up receiver.) Now if it rings again, Nora, answer it. I’ll be back to tea, but don’t say so to any one. Don’t know. Just say I’m out, and that you’ll give any message.

Nora. I will do that same. (Miss C. goes out.)

Nora. So that box is the tillyphone, is it? Quare things they have in Americky——little rooms that goes up or down with [5] yez, pieanny’s that play thimselves, trumpets that sing at yez, and boxes that talk to yez! (Bell rings.) There goes the thing again. Well, she put this to her ear, and talked through this. Hello!—— It’s mesilf—— Sure and it isn’t. It’s number 12 Maple Avenue, Mrs. Coortney’s house—— Yis, I’m the gurrul, Nora Flanagan—— No, she’s not at home, she’s gone out, and the young lady too—— Sure, and she said she would be home at taytime—— -Oh, begorra, she said I wasn’t to know whin she’d be home. I’ll give her a message if yez like—— Who did you say?—— Oh, yis, Mrs. Donahue—— No?—— Oh, Mrs. Van Houton? Is that roight?—— Yis, I’ll tell her yez hollered through the little box, but I’ll not tell her yez called, for yez didn’t. I niver set eyes on yez. I can lie, if I must, for my misthress, but I shan’t lie to her—— Yis, goodbye to yez. (Hangs up receiver.) Sure and I did that in foine shtyle. It’s Nora Flanagan can learn the Yankee ways. Now where was that woman, I wonder? And how did I hear the voice av her so plain? It’s witchcraft, I do belave. Sure, and I’ll ask the praste, nixt toime I go to confession, if it’s all roight fer a good gurrul to middle with. If not, I shan’t answer the crather anny more. (Bell rings.) There it goes again. (Takes down receiver.) Hello!—— Yis, it’s Nora, sure—— No, there’s no one ilse here—— Sure, it’s a good hand yez are at coortin, but how do yez know how pretty I am?—— Yis, av coorse it’s Nora—— Odd? Yis, maybe. Yez own sounds odd, too—— Yis, I caught it, but I don’t care to have me ears kissed—— Do I, now? Well I’m not sure—— Yis, I’ll tell yez tonight, if yez come—— The theayter? Sure I will that same—— And a little supper, did yez say, aftherwards? I’ll be there—— No, it’s no freak, it’s the right voice av me—— Yis, I do thin, a little—— Well, goodbye thin, me dear—— Yis, at eight, goodbye. (Hangs up receiver.) To think I’ve got me a beau, so soon, and I’ve niver set eyes on him, nayther. Reginald! It’s a pretty name, that it is. Whin did he see me, I wonder? (Primps before glass.) Well there’s lots of Yankee gurruls not so good looking as Nora Flanagan. I must hurry up the tay, and be riddy whin me young man gits here. Bedad, I’ll be guessing he’s the perliceman that told me the way here. He was a foine looking man, to be sure, and Irish, by his look and brogue, but not by the name av him. Reginald! Real foine it sounds! (Exit into kitchen.)

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SCENE II.

(Same setting as before. Mrs. C. and Miss C. just being let in by Nora.)

Mrs. C. And did any one call for me while I was out, Nora?

Nora. No mem, a Mrs. Donahue hollered through the tellyphone, and wanted me to say she called, but she niver came near the dure at all, at all. She didn’t seem to want nothin’ but to know what number this was, and what my name was. Rather sassy, she was, I thought.

Mrs. C. Mrs. Donahue? I don’t know any Mrs. Donahue.

Nora. Sure and I thought she didn’t know yez, all the toime, mem. She jist wanted to holler through the little bellbox.

Mrs. C. Is tea ready?

Nora. It is, mem.

Miss C. And did any one call for me, at the door or the phone?

Nora. Niver a sowl, Miss, (to Mrs. C.) Plaze mem, may I have me avenin’ out tonight, instid av tomorry?

Mrs. C. Why, I don’t know. Why?

Nora. It’s invited out I am, by me young man, mem.

Mrs. C. But you told me you had no followers.

Nora. No more I did, thin, but I hev one now. He called me on the phone, and I said I’d go. I must, mem, if I lose me place.

Mrs. C. What does he do, Nora?

Nora. He’s a perliceman, I belave, mem, and he has a swate way av making love over the phone. Sure, and I didn’t know yez could kiss through those little boxes.

Miss C. Oh! But where is he going to take you, Nora?

Nora. To the theayter, and a bit av a supper aftherwards, Miss. May I go, mem?

Mrs. C. But who is he, Nora?

Nora. Me beau, mem.

Mrs. C. What is his name, I mean?

Nora. His Christian name is Reginald, mem.

Mrs. C. His last name?

Nora. I fergit, exactly, mem.

Miss C. (Suspiciously.) Are you sure it was you he called? [7]

Nora. And who else should it be? He called me Nora darlint, and made love over the phone in great shape. Sure, and he’s to git his answer tonight, so I must go.

Miss C. Mamma! It was Reginald! He always calls me Nora.

Nora. Is that yez name?

Miss C. It’s Eleanora.

Nora. Well, it’s mesilf that don’t want yez beau, but nayther kin yez hov moine. I’ll tell yez what I’ll do. We’ll both be riddy at eight, and bedad, he kin choose betwixt us.

Mrs. C. Do you mean to say, Eleanora, that he would dare court you over the phone?

Miss C. Well, he might. See here, Nora, I’ll show you my Reginald’s picture, and if that’s the one that comes, bring him in and call me. If not, you may have him. Is that fair? (Shows photo.)

Nora. Sure and if that’s the man, yez kin have him and wilcome. It’s no city dude loike that, that Nora Flanagan wants. But bedad, if it is him, yez’ll hev to say yis or no this noight, for I promised him through the little phone that yez would. Good luck to yez, Miss, and good luck to me, too. If I’ve made a mis larrago this toime, mebbe the little bellbox’ll bring me a good Irish beau yit. Come out to tay, and thin bedad, we’ll both git ready for our beaux, and good luck to the both av us. Sure and it’s great fun answering the phone annyhow. (She goes out, followed by the others.)

A CORNER IN HEARTS. By Edna Randolph Worrell. Parlor play for 4 young men and 1 lady, or 5 men. Very amusing. All the lovers propose to the same girl. Rich humor; pleasing situations. Excellent for any time. 25 minutes. 15 cents.

A DAY AT HAPPY HOLLOW SCHOOL. By Lettie Cook VanDerveer. A new play of the “Deestrick Skule” type. Up-to-date wit and clever drolleries. A city automobile party in contrast with rural youngsters. Lots of fun. Songs, etc., may be introduced. A capital play to make money for church or school. 25 cents.

A GOOSE AND SOME GEESE. By Eleanor Stinchcomb. A Jolly Mother Goose play with a very pointed climax. For 5 girls and 7 boys. Time, 15 minutes. 15 cents.

A HALLOWE’EN ADVENTURE. A lively play, by Effie Louise Koogle. Full of ghostly excitement and spooky frolic. Specially suited for social occasions. 8 males and 8 females, or more. 3 scenes. 1 hour. 15 cents.

A LITTLE HEROINE OF THE REVOLUTION. A play for all ages. By Elizabeth F. Guptill. A little girl is sent ostensibly to play with a friend, but really to carry a message to General Marion. She is captured by the British, but by her cleverness deceives them, and reaches her destination. Full of historic interest. 10 males, 5 females. More boys may be added as soldiers, if desired. 25 cents.

AL MARTIN’S COUNTRY STORE. A burlesque for from 15 to 30 participants, by Archibald Humboldt and Martelle Everett. Unsurpassed for merriment, taking qualities and ease of production. A country store with all its peculiar environments is depicted. The loafers, the small customers, the gossipers, the lovers, the innocent fun makers, all have parts. There is a graceful plot that gathers interest as the play proceeds and culminates in a brilliant climax. Unquestionably the greatest success as a popular entertainment. 25 cents.

CONTEST OF THE NATIONS, THE. A spectacular play or cantata, by Elizabeth F. Guptill. The Goddess of Liberty and 12 nations compete for the laurel crown. It embraces a fine march; splendid songs by Archibald Humboldt. Very effective. 13 ladies. 25 cents.

CABBAGE HILL SCHOOL. A humorous play for children or young people, by Elizabeth F. Guptill. Presents the trials of a new “skewlmarm” on the opening day, and the performances of the pupils in the presence of august visitors on closing day. A veritable mirth-provoker. Full of the richest humor. 10 males. 16 female characters (or less). 25c.

CROWNING THE MAY QUEEN. A spectacular play by Elizabeth F. Guptill. Children go Maying, select and crown a queen, wind the Maypole, and have a merry time. The frolic is quickly changed to great excitement by the appearance of a gypsy, who attempts to abduct them. A very clever plot and a happy arrangement. 9 boys and 8 girls, or 17 girls. 25 cents.

CUPID’S JOKE. A charming little drama in which Cupid plays an Important part. A splendid society play for St. Valentine’s Day, or any social occasion. 5 male and 5 female characters, and Cupid. 3 scenes, 45 minutes. By Effie Louise Koogle. 15 cents.

DIALOGS FOR ANY TIME, ORIGINAL. By Elizabeth F. Guptill. Interesting and amusing. May be given in any room with very few property requirements, by primary and intermediate grades. The author’s name is a guarantee of their excellence. They are witty, spicy and lively. 25 cents.

DISPELLING OF BIG JIM, THE. A negro farce in one act, by Sterling C. Brewer. Decidedly humorous. Big Jim is being tried by the officials of Big Bethel Church for some misdemeanor. The trial is full of interesting occurrences and culminates in an exciting event. Full of darky humor. 8 male characters. 30 minutes. 15 cents.

DOCTOR AND PATIENT. By John M. Drake. 2 male characters. Very funny. 5c.

DOIG’S EXCELLENT DIALOGS. By Agnes M. Doig. Contains four excellent dialogs for the primary grades. “Keeping Store,” 3 girls, 1 boy. “Guessing,” 3 girls, 2 boys. “Playing School,” 4 boys, 4 girls. “Christmas Eve,” 3 girls, 2 boys. 10 cents.

DOLL DIALOG. This is a very instructive dialog for 4 little girls. 5 cents.

DOLLY SHOW, THE. A dialog in rhyme for 7 little girls and 2 boys. The girls have a baby show with their dollies, and each “mother” shows her baby off to the best advantage. The judge is unusually wise, awarding the prize to the satisfaction of each one. The sayings of the little ones are cute, and the whole performance a great success. 15 cents.

DOLLS’ SYMPOSIUM, THE. A most unique and captivating play, by Elizabeth F. Guptill. It combines spicy dialog, fascinating drills, clever burlesque, entrancing songs and cunning antics. Children impersonate the dolls and do the most amusing stunts. Unequaled as a surprising fun maker. For any number from 16 to 60. One-half to one and one-half hours, as desired. 25 cents.

GOING TO MEET AUNT HATTIE. A dialog by Mrs. Hunt. For 1 male and 3 female characters. 5 cents.

THE GOLDEN GOBLET. An exceedingly clever farce, with female cast, for Bachelor Girls’ and Women’s Clubs, Sororities, etc., by Louise Rand Bascom, author of “ The Masonic Ring .” Uproariously funny with absurd situations and comical elaborations. A “hit” for any occasion. Easy to produce. Any number of characters, but 12 required. 1 hr. 35c.

HEIR OF MT. VERNON, THE. A Colonial Society Play for any occasion, in which Washington’s social life, sterling manhood and courteous manners are portrayed. In one scene Christmas is celebrated in rare plantation style. Lively with old plantation melodies and pranks. By Effie Louise Koogle. For grammar grades or adults. 4 scenes, 8 boys and 8 girls, or more will be better. 1 to 2 hours. 25 cents.

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New York          TULLAR-MEREDITH CO.          Chicago

THE RAG SOCIABLE. A quaint old fashioned entertainment which is always sure to please. Libretto by Edith S. Tillotson. Music by various Composers. The dialog is very spicy and interesting, and humor and pathos are beautifully blended in the various musical selections. The characters include Mrs. Winters and her two daughters Betsy and Maria, Miss Jemima Rush, Mrs. Bassett, Mrs. Collins, Mrs. Salina Grey, the Allen twins (elderly), Mrs. Martha Ann Hall, Miss Eliza Hall, Mrs. Jane Tompkins and Amanda Tompkins. The list of characters may be extended ad. lib. to meet local conditions.

A fine entertainment for a class of women or girls, Ladies’ Aid, Christian Endeavor and Epworth League Societies, etc. Price. 25 cents per copy.

LOVE FINDS THE WAY, or Tho Detective That Father Hired. Music by Chas. H. Gabriel. Words by Rev. Wm. Danforth, author of “The Old District School,” etc. A highly amusing farcical song-skit, with four characters: A Determined Young Lover, an Irate Father, a Daughter with a Will of Her Own, and an Aiding and Abetting Mother—parts: tenor, basso, soprano and alto.

This composition consists of singing and dialog for each part and will serve to enliven any entertainment. The music is moderately easy, melodious and should be available in practically all communities. This work consists of some 12 pages in sheet music form.

The story is as follows: A father, who objects to his daughter having a beau, believing that she is planning to elope with an unknown young man, advertises for a detective to ferret the matter out. The young lover answers the advertisement, and the father hires him to detect the culprit, promising to pay him “anything within reason.” When the young lover’s true identity is disclosed, he demands as his reward, for having detected himself, the hand of the daughter. The irate father objects. The daughter eventually convinces him that true love was the real detective in the case, and the parental consent is given. Price. $1.50: 50 per cent. discount.

THE OLD DISTRICT SCHOOL. A farce in two acts (new version). Book by Wm. Danforth. Music arr. by Geo. F. Rosche. This is a burlesque on the district school of 100 years ago. Ezekiel Simpkins, the teacher, is the central character. His costume is a tight Prince Albert coat, with brass buttons, or a worn and faded “claw-hammer” coat, colored vest cut low; stock collar, with large black tie; trousers, “high-water,” with a patch of other color on one knee; well-worn shoes. Bald gray wig and “side” whiskers. The costumes of the pupils are in keeping with those of the teacher. The characters all read their lines from the book, so that there is very little to be memorized and for this reason this work can be prepared in a very short time. Price, postpaid, 50 cents per copy.

THE CHAPERON. A humorous Operetta in three Acts. Libretto by Wm. Danforth. Music by Geo. F. Rosche. “The Chaperon” is a humorous operetta designed for church choir and young people’s societies. It will be found available in all communities in which seven young men and seven young ladies who sing can be found. The music is bright, tuneful, easy to learn and easy to remember. The dialogue is witty, clean, wholesome and entertaining. Price, postpaid, 60 cents per copy.

THE VISION OF HENSEL. An evening with the old songs. The old songs of childhood, youth, love, war and home. Libretto by Ellan N. Wood. There is no friend like an old friend and after all there are no songs we love quite so much as the old ones.

This cantata furnishes a beautiful medium for the introduction of the old songs which we all know and love. There is just enough libretto to the work to form a continuous chain of thought throughout, and we know of no cantata that will afford such a pleasing entertainment at such a small expenditure of labor. The book is well worth its price if only to secure this fine collection of old home songs. Full of sentiment, humor and pathos and decidedly new and fresh in construction. Price, 30 cents per copy, postpaid; $3.00 per dozen, not prepaid; add 3 cents per copy for postage.

THE SPINSTERS’ CLUB. A humorous operetta in two acts. Libretto by Harriet D. Castle. Music by Geo. F. Rosche. “The Spinsters’ Club” is a humorous operetta designed for church choirs and young people’s societies. It will be found available in all communities in which a church choir is found. The music is bright, tuneful, and yet easy to learn and memorize. The dialogue is witty, pleasing and entertaining. Price, postpaid 60 cents per copy.

A returnable sample copy of any of the above mailed on receipt of 3 cents for postage; to be returned postpaid or paid for in Thirty days.

NEARER MY GOD TO THEE. Posed under the direction of Eleanor H. Denig. This is a particularly fine production and lends itself admirably for a twelve-minute addition to an evening’s entertainment in the church or hall. The instructions are very clear so that this pantomime may be prepared by anyone with ordinary talent or ability. The fourteen full figure halftone illustrations will be found an excellent help.

The music is very complete. The regular hymn tune is printed for mixed voices; also an original quartet for voices of women and on original setting for voices of men and an original duet for soprano and alto by J. S. Fearis, thus furnishing a variety of music found in no other publication of this sort. Price, 40 cents postpaid. “Not sent on examination.”

IT CAME UPON THE MIDNIGHT CLEAR. Posed under the direction of Eleanor H. Denig. This pantomime will be particularly interesting during the winter season for a twelve-minute addition to church or other entertainments. The directions are very elaborate, enabling any person to prepare the same successfully. The music is very complete, consisting of a hymn tune for mixed voices; an original setting for voices of both women and men; also a very fine duet soprano and alto; the latter by Chas. H. Gabriel. Price, 40 cents per copy postpaid. “Not sent on examination.”

New York          TULLAR-MEREDITH CO.          Chicago

The School at Mud Hollow. A burlesque in two parts. 8 Males and 19 Females. Time about 2 hours. Price 35 cents.

PART I. In which is portrayed the difficulties encountered by Miss Arabella Pinkham, who has come to “Mud Hollow” to assume the responsible duties of “Teacher” in the school. In selecting “Mud Hollow” she seeks a change from the city life she is accustomed to, and finds plenty of it in the manners, customs and dialect of the pupils. From start to finish there is nothing but fun.

PART II. Which represents the last day at the school, when the proud parents are present to listen to the final examination of the class by the Supervisor and enjoy the program which is rendered by the pupils. Part II. offers an opportunity for about 60 minutes of the finest fun possible. “ The School at Mud Hollow ” may be given in one evening, but for those who would prefer to make two evenings of it, or to give only one part, we offer the same work announced below under the title of “ The New Teacher at Mud Hollow School ” and “ The Last Day at Mud Hollow School ” either of which can be given as a complete entertainment without regard to the other one.

The New Teacher at Mud Hollow School. Being Part I. of THE SCHOOL AT MUD HOLLOW. 6 Males and 14 Females. Time about 1 hour. Price 25 cents.

The Last Day at Mud Hollow School. Being Part II. of THE SCHOOL AT MUD HOLLOW. 8 Males and 19 Females. Time about 1 hour. Price 25 cents.

Two mysterious pieces of paper fall into the hands of the children, one being found by the BOYS and one by the GIRLS. The meaning of the inscription on each remains a mystery until it is discerned that by placing the papers together they have the message that the “Old Witch” of the North has captured “Santa” and holds him in an ice prison at the North Pole. Of course there could be no “Merry Christmas” without their “patron saint”, so guided by the “Fairy Godmother” they start for the North Pole to rescue him. The “Old Witch” endeavors to block the rescuers’ way by the assistance of “Old Zero” and the “Snow Fairies” but when they learn that the snow drifts they are piling up are to aid in keeping “Santa” from his usual Christmas activities they get the “Sunbeam Fairies” to come to their aid and melt the snow, while they bind with a frozen cord the “Old Witch,” who is found indulging in a nap which she takes only once every hundred years. With the “Old Witch” powerless and in their control the Rescue of Santa is an easy matter.

Tho’ belated somewhat by his enforced stay at the North Pole, the children are glad to become his “aides” in spreading a “Merry Christmas” through all the world. This is a very clever plot, well worked out, and will make a decided hit for the Christmas season. 4 Boys and 5 Girls with any number of Fairies. Time about 1 hour. Price 25 cents.

Taking the Census. Mr. Cole, the Census Taker, has a funny experience in an attempt to gather the facts required by the government from Mrs. Almira Johnson, a “cullud lady,” and her young son Alexander. Three characters only. Time about 10 minutes. Price 10 cents.

Answering the Phone. Mrs. Courtney and her daughter have a most trying experience with Nora Flanagan, the new “hired girl,” who in their absence attempts to carry out the instructions given with special reference to “answering the phone.” The final situation in which Nora makes a date with Miss Courtney’s “intended” is ridiculous in the extreme. 3 females. Time about 15 minutes. Price 10 cents.

The Twins and How They Entertained the New Minister. They have a delightful time telling family secrets to the “New Minister,” who has called for the first time. They explain the necessity of seeing their mother to find out from her if she is “In,” for so often she is “Out” when she is “In” and “In” when she is “Out.” 2 Males and 1 Female. Time about 15 minutes. Price 10 cents.

NO ENTERTAINMENTS SENT “ON EXAMINATION”